The Con...

Yesterday and today I went to DragonCon with Mommy and Daddy. I met some interesting characters...and by characters I mean tools...and by tools I mean dorks. I when I say I met them, I really mean I pointed at them a laughed...a lot.

Speaking of, here's a Klingon that was guarding the elevators. Except he kept calling them Turbolifts. Mbleeeek!


So first off, it's called "The Con". If you go and call it DragonCon, the nerds will beat you with their foam swords and phasers, and call you things like "Fanboy". Whatever, nerds.

Next, to get in is FREE. You can go to this place and watch all the tools you want for FREE. Of course mom and dad did that at Georgia Tech, but this time the nerds have costumes.

Dad wanted to see one thing at this little shindig, and that was his favorite author - Robert Jordan. Except, to get into the room to see the dude, dad would have to have purchased a Con Badge for the modest fee of $30. That's a lot for an autograph and a handshake, so dad settled for peeking in the doorway while the Con bouncers (read fatties with headsets and walkie talkies) silently mocked him and called him Fanboy. No autograph for Dad, but he said that it's ok, because he probably would have simply said something stupid and uninspired when he met the guy, anyway. And plus mom turned down Dad's suggestion that she let RJ sign her magnificent bosom. Way to be a sport, mom.

On day 1, Mom and Dad just scoped out the place and the prices. On day 2, they brought along several of my uncles. Specifically uncles Toro, Caesar, Dave, and a friend (dad can't remember his name). They nominated Dad as the Leader ( he preferred the monicker Gold Leader) and allowed him to lead the way.

Now, because the adults (in their infinite wisdom) chose not to buy Con Badges, we were stuck just milling around the area watching people and peeking through doorways. We snuck into one large vendor area, and were bounced by some toolio who saw we had no badges. He didn't even work there, he was just a random attendee. Apparently the nerd herd is self-protecting and self-regulating, and through the power of this decentralized command structure we were recognized instantly as outsiders and a potential threat. Thus, we were neutralized. Live long and prosper, toolio. All I wanted to see was that sweet table of Farscape memorabilia.

Even with this limitation, the people watching was unmatched, unparalleled in it's quality. Dad, Mom & co. got many sweet pictures.

And the award of the day for random acquaintance reunion goes to A.C. Churanya, one of dad & mom's old frat brothers. AKPsi for life, indeed. Apparently he was speaking at the Con to the Herd about Nasa and its current projects and goals.
The conversation was something like this:
A.C.: [kicks Dad] Hey, don't I know you? Micah, right?
Dad: [looks long and hard] Yeah...
A.C.: I'm A.C., from AKPsi!
Dad: Holy crap, yes! What's up?...
[insert small talk, pleasantries, introductions]
Dad: So what are you here for? You a fanboy, too?
A.C.: No, I graduated with Aerospace Engineering, if you remember, and shortly after, I got picked to work for my old professor who started a company. We are now consultants for NASA. I'm speaking here later.
[pause]
Dad: I work in software. I hate my life.
[insert uncomfortable silence]

Way to go Dad. Great job carrying your family's honor.

I rode around The Con in style. Check out this great picture of me and mom -- you can't really see me due to that death contraption she carried me around in all day. It's called a Baby Bjorn. I though Bjorn was that crazy bitch from Iceland who wears live swans to award shows, but I stand corrected. Regardless, that sucker gets hot!

Anyway, the Con basically wore my ass out. Plus, I no doubt will contract some disease from the 20,000 dorks there. I hope it's not a bad one like the clap, or worse yet the one that makes you fat, pasty, socially inept, and crave doritos & mountain dew.

Dad just said mom looked hot today. Gross. Parent sex. Ewwww...


That is all...